Re: [GRIMDARK] Fallout Equestria: Project Horizons Discussion

[IncoherentOrange]

Wow, cool, man.

The private messages I've gotten that I've been proud of are a critique request and an editing request, and thank-yous for doing them. Feels good, like a lot.

What feels not so good is when someone tore apart my first and second stories over PMs, breaking me temporarily and defining me as a merely mediocre author in my now-jaded perspective, one that remains present to this day. Prior, I thought I was decent. But, confidence leads to overconfidence which leads to failure. It was the only negative piece of in-depth feedback I've ever received, and it hit like a ton of bricks.

[Elexius]

Failure, to me, is terrifying.

[Ironmonger]

What I try to do is copy the really good writer's styles to an extent given that they know what they are doing. I tried to copy Somber a little.

[Stringtheory]

The "power level" of a character really doesn't matter unless you're writing a strictly action-based story or a video game, IMO. Sure, if there are no challenges that the character can't be expected to easily overcome, there's no tension, but challenges can be more than just physical. Maybe a black-and-red Alicorn named Nightbringer Bloodravage (whose talent is making things explode by glaring at them) has to go home every night after slaughtering countless invading changelings and wonder if he isn't somehow a murderer - after all, it's not like these creatures pose a threat to him. What is he fighting for, anyway? (And why do the changelings keep throwing themselves at him?) The story could follow his attempts to try to negotiate a peace agreement behind Celestia and Luna's backs (despite having no training and, at the start, no idea who to talk to), even as he continues to single-hoofedly defend Equestria. True, due to the meta of MLP fanfiction right now, I'd recommend not making that character in the first place, but he could be made to work. Context is very important.

So, yeah, I have no idea if your character is overpowered, but that's not necessarily the question you want to be asking, anyway. :) (other people can probably provide better answers, don't worry)

^this
OP/mary sue-ness is entirely based on context, but generally in this fandom whenever you have a half breed combining two 'superior' types (like unicorn and pegasus), people's initial thoughts will probably be OP/Mary Sue, if you're writing a story you're going to have to give your character very obvious flaws right out of the gate of both the biological and personality variety, because what is the point of having challenges thrown at the character if their innate skills can solve it in a second? The question when you're making an OC is 'could this character actually exist in the show?' if the answer involves magic then it might be time to reconsider or move your OC to a universe where they could exist (like for instance cyborgs in FO:E)
and if that OC is a personification of yourself...well, there's a reason why no one's allowed to have an their ponification be an Alicorn, except for Lauren Faust herself...

((Cobalt, I would totally read that story you came up with))

[Elexius]

Pre- Wasteland Fallout Equestria.

[Stringtheory]

Pre- Wasteland Fallout Equestria.

okay then...but you'll have to come up with a hell of a backstory to make him even part way believable

[Elexius]

My "one hell of a story" will involve the Changeling invasion of Canterlot.

[Elexius]

There is no requirement to follow fanon canon.

[Elexius]

Zonies are fanon canon, therefore, Zebracorns are possible.

[Stringtheory]

My "one hell of a story" will involve the Changeling invasion of Canterlot.

I think I know what might've happened during the invasion...
though are changelings and ponies even compatible genetically?...wait, lets not have the genetics argument again and just write it off as magic.
plus don't forget to factor in the 10+ years from 'canon' equestria to when the war with the zebras starts, then the 10 more years from the war's beginning to when littlehorn happens, and the year after that the ministries get set up

[Stringtheory]

There is no requirement to follow fanon canon.

true, there isn't, but in order to make it believable, you generally have to follow canon, or create something that could be considered canon

Zonies are fanon canon, therefore, Zebracorns are possible.

I never said that Zebracorns weren't possible, I'm just highly doubting the changeling part, and super highly doubting the combination of all three

[Caoimhe]

That feel bro:

Kkat happycatfaceemoticon'd me on IRC when i offered congrats. i felt honoured :)

[Caoimhe]

I've been planning to write a FoE story for the good part of 2 months, making notes every day and still can not think of a good theme, but it will involve humour and a strong psychological aspect with less consistent violence. I'm taking this shit pretty damn seriously because if it works well, I'd want to also transition it to be pony-less. It's a very difficult task as I'm trying to strive for originality among the fics.

Ideally I'd also like to act it as an audio drama with a slideshow of original art on youtube with written chapters following after. My brother is up for narrator and certain male parts, but I still don't have the story planned.

I want it to be reaaaaal special. :)

[Ironmonger]

The sam freaking hell is IRC?

[Caoimhe]

A wretched hive of scum and villainy.

[Vergil]

The sam freaking hell is IRC?

It's multiplayer notepad

[Ironmonger]

While we're on the subject of OC's I'm going to take this as a chance to ask if my OC is OP. Iron Fury is described as being "twice and a half the size of an average stallion" and is also a unicorn. Powerful telekinetic and uses powerful shield spells but is a complete ditz when it comes to other spells, he's no Element of Magic. SPECIAL is 10-6-5-1-8-10-0 respectively. And he's a noob at social maneuvering.

[Caoimhe]

Have a story about a zebralicornchanging that cant fly, do magic or transmogrify and is shit with potions and storytelling and make a story about the character being regarded as an all powerful miracle creature and dealing with the shame of being ordinary.

Also I really need to make an OC already.

[Stringtheory]

Have a story about a zebralicornchanging that cant fly, do magic or transmogrify and is shit with potions and storytelling and make a story about the character being regarded as an all powerful miracle creature and dealing with the shame of being ordinary.

Also I really need to make an OC already.

again, that's a story which I would totally read

[Sindri]

Zonies are fanon canon, therefore, Zebracorns are possible.

Yeah, zebracorns are legit. In fact IIRC the Professor in PH is one, or was before she became a brain in a jar. The changeling bit is strange but not inherently bad; every version of fanon for them I've seen keeps them distinct from ponies but it's your story. The part that worries me is that you come in and ask if a zebra/unicorn/changeling is overpowered, and nothing else. To me that says that you don't have a character in mind, or a story, you have a stat sheet. Describe them without mentioning their appearance or species. Think about the themes of the tale. Try to have some idea of who your characters are and what they want, rather than just coming up with something that sounds cool and assuming everyone else will also think it's cool enough to carry a story alone. It's relatively easy to shift power levels around to keep things interesting. It's quite difficult to put a personality into something without one, and nearly impossible to make an interesting story without any real characters.

Have a story about a zebralicornchanging that cant fly, do magic or transmogrify and is shit with potions and storytelling and make a story about the character being regarded as an all powerful miracle creature and dealing with the shame of being ordinary..

I'd read that.



And on a completely different note, I came across http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/obsidian/project-eternity and was amused by the title.

[Kippershy]

Zonies are fanon canon, therefore, Zebracorns are possible.

Yeah, zebracorns are legit. In fact IIRC the Professor in PH is one, or was before she became a brain in a jar. The changeling bit is strange but not inherently bad; every version of fanon for them I've seen keeps them distinct from ponies but it's your story. The part that worries me is that you come in and ask if a zebra/unicorn/changeling is overpowered, and nothing else. To me that says that you don't have a character in mind, or a story, you have a stat sheet. Describe them without mentioning their appearance or species. Think about the themes of the tale. Try to have some idea of who your characters are and what they want, rather than just coming up with something that sounds cool and assuming everyone else will also think it's cool enough to carry a story alone. It's relatively easy to shift power levels around to keep things interesting. It's quite difficult to put a personality into something without one, and nearly impossible to make an interesting story without any real characters.

Have a story about a zebralicornchanging that cant fly, do magic or transmogrify and is shit with potions and storytelling and make a story about the character being regarded as an all powerful miracle creature and dealing with the shame of being ordinary..

I'd read that.



And on a completely different note, I came across http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/obsidian/project-eternity and was amused by the title.

Actually, she's confirmed for Zony but I don't think she's a zonicorn.

[Sindri]

Actually, she's confirmed for Zony but I don't think she's a zonicorn.

Right, nevermind, that became part of my headcanon after I came to the conclusion (based on evidence I no longer recall) that she was probably distantly related to Twilight. Pay me no mind, at least until I find a reread that chapter.

[O. Hinds]

While we're on the subject of OC's I'm going to take this as a chance to ask if my OC is OP. Iron Fury is described as being "twice and a half the size of an average stallion" and is also a unicorn. Powerful telekinetic and uses powerful shield spells but is a complete ditz when it comes to other spells, he's no Element of Magic. SPECIAL is 10-6-5-1-8-10-0 respectively. And he's a noob at social maneuvering.

...Luck of zero?!


Re Silver Stripe:

A white unicorn mare with gray zebra-like stripes on her legs and mane was writing on one of the boards at the front of the hall with a piece of chalk. She finished writing a line of weird mathy stuff, put the chalk down, and sighed.

[Ironmonger]

...Luck of zero?!

[Kippershy]

While we're on the subject of OC's I'm going to take this as a chance to ask if my OC is OP. Iron Fury is described as being "twice and a half the size of an average stallion" and is also a unicorn. Powerful telekinetic and uses powerful shield spells but is a complete ditz when it comes to other spells, he's no Element of Magic. SPECIAL is 10-6-5-1-8-10-0 respectively. And he's a noob at social maneuvering.

...Luck of zero?!


Re Silver Stripe:

A white unicorn mare with gray zebra-like stripes on her legs and mane was writing on one of the boards at the front of the hall with a piece of chalk. She finished writing a line of weird mathy stuff, put the chalk down, and sighed.

I stand corrected, my bad.

[Ametros]

And on a completely different note, I came across http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/obsidian/project-eternity and was amused by the title.

You should read update #5 if you didn't. It pertains to souls. http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/obsidian/project-eternity/posts
This project is looking quite interesting. Looking forward to when it's finally done. Sweetie Belle

[Ironmonger]

It gave a gentle nudge to your skill points and increased critical chances. I designed him using New Vegas' SPECIAL system.

[Ironmonger]

With as unlucky as he is he'd get smashed in the face with a club on Saint Patrick's Day.

[Ironmonger]

^
Thanks to that I now have the image of Rage Rarity stuck in my head.

[Ironmonger]

If Fluttershy has a rage-mode I'm guessing the other five do as well.

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