Re: [GRIMDARK] Fallout Equestria: Project Horizons Discussion

[atikin]

Chapter 75a commentary... 

Spoiler:

[O. Hinds]

How could Hammersmith possibly use his levitation after his horn been cracked? Is it some kind of mistake or am I missing something?

Hm. Point. Thanks. I don't think that, in this universe, a single crack would completely shut down levitation, but...

Okay, new version:

I also fixed another error (a minor wording one) I spotted in the area, so thanks for that, too.

Off-topic:
I also started reading the "Wasteland Bouquet" by your suggestions, and I really love it so far. May as well suggest it now! Easy and "light" to read. Most of chapters are short too, which I like, because I don't usually have time to read a lot in one sit...

Good! :)

[joltius]

I also fixed another error (a minor wording one) I spotted in the area, so thanks for that, too.

What error did you fixed and how is text looks now?

[atikin]

Okay, new version:

Thanks, that makes more sense. Although I still think a crack in the horn with knock unicorn's magic out...

[atikin]

One more thing... :

[O. Hinds]

What error did you fixed and how is text looks now?

Here's that area of text, though:

I'm afraid that I don't remember just what it was, but I think it was tidying up the wording of the sentence above beginning with "The steel sledge". While I could, with a bit of difficultly, look it up, I don't think it was significant enough to warrant that.

Thanks, that makes more sense.

Ah, thanks.

Also I still think a crack in the horn with knock unicorn's magic out...

Sorry.

One more thing... :

It's a blend of both, as I interpret it.

[atikin]

That's how that part looked like before the editing:

The steel mallet came down, pulverizing Toaster's immolated remains with his steel sledge.

[atikin]

Also I still think a crack in the horn with knock unicorn's magic out...

Sorry.

Nothing to be sorry about. It's just my thought.
Although Blackjack was able to use her magic wile her horn had been damaged on the moon, I think it's because of moon dust that stuck to it and helped her to do a last push. In this case, however, there's just a cracked horn with nothing to help it, so I'm not sure how he managed to do magic...

[O. Hinds]

That's how that part looked like before the editing:

The steel mallet came down, pulverizing Toaster's immolated remains with his steel sledge.

Ah, thanks.

Also I still think a crack in the horn with knock unicorn's magic out...

Sorry.

Nothing to be sorry about. It's just my thought.
Although Blackjack was able to use her magic wile her horn had been damaged on the moon, I think it's because of moon dust that stuck to it and helped her to do a last push. In this case, however, there's just a cracked horn with nothing to help it, so I'm not sure how he managed to do magic...

Well, we don't know just how damaging a cracked horn is (in this universe), as far as I know.

[ILM126]

Note: I am still reading, just found this...

“Eh, could be worse,” Rainbow replied as she dumped Storm Chaser across his back

her?

Isn't she reffering to Chicanery?

Oh, never mind)

Yeah, she was.

---

Alright, I couldn't post what I have written so far for the mini review. I've got camp tomorrow (Wednesday) till Friday, but I will be working on the idea of TOM's trajectory and speed. Along with questions that still has to be answered... Over all... Really well done, a great clap to the FoE - PH story team ^^

See you all in 3 days time ^^

(Note: I finished reading the chapter 20 hours ago, I couldn't post it then it's because I stayed up to read the chapter... Till 2~3am? It's about 22:30 Tue here now...) :P

[ILM126]

Also, Somber wrote that he might need some tiding up his Patreon account. I've got a Patreon account that I revised on it a few times and I've seen other user's profiles, so I know how to make a Patreon page look awesome ^^

At least, if that's alright for me to help? ^^"

[Luminous Lead]

Well, we don't know just how damaging a cracked horn is (in this universe), as far as I know.

I know in MN7 it caused wild losses of accuracy and possibly debilitating pain for Coral, but it worked (albeit only when everything in an area needed to be whipped around).  As for this *universe* I don't expect it to be bound by the same continuity, but unless there's something definitive, that'll stay my headcannon.

75a:

Wow. Channelling some Orwell there, Goldenblood.

1984:

[O. Hinds]

I know in MN7 it caused wild losses of accuracy and possibly debilitating pain for Coral, but it worked (albeit only when everything in an area needed to be whipped around). As for this *universe* I don't expect it to be bound by the same continuity, but unless there's something definitive, that'll stay my headcannon.

Not sure how I missed this before, sorry; thank you for the extra information.

[Technowolf]

Eye tentacle penises

[JadedPony]

I can't tell if these are typos or if it's suppose to be Charity being shell shocked but they come across to me as typos.

You should dake your kids up to the bountains, Miss Harpica. Show them dhe reservoir. I’b sure they’d enjoy it.

I bow your foals probably would love a little trip to the lake, after being coobed up for so long,

[JadedPony]

This is the shit that makes me want to stop writing.

https://www.reddit.com/r/falloutequestria/comments/33seik/is_murky_number_seven_over/cqr92nh

Is Horizons killing other fics?

What is killing MN7 is the massive breaks between postings and the story going three chapters without making very much progress towards things actually happening. MN7 has a good story but it's very disjointed and scattered randomly.

MN7 Spoilers:

See: http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/MacGuffin

Project Horizons is falling to the same trap and it's made me lose interest in it. I use to look forward to it now I just read it when ever I think about it because so many of the good characters have been killed off and, forgive me if this seems presumptuous of me to dictate how things work in a fictional universe, I'm pretty sure your friends have to be ALIVE for you to work in harmony with them to stop the malignant evil god-rock that is only weakened by harmony.

Doing everything by yourself has worked so well for everyone in the history of Equestria, right? But hey, if your main character isn't smart enough to do it right then I guess blowing up half the planet to get the job done works to...?? Half a planet is better than no planet I guess. It reminds me of those episodes of MLP where Twilight left all her friends behind and solved the episode's problems by blasting ponies with magic.

MLP: Friendship is overrated.

[O. Hinds]

I can't tell if these are typos or if it's suppose to be Charity being shell shocked but they come across to me as typos.

Neither; those are effects of the damage to her nose.

[Luminous Lead]

I can't tell if these are typos or if it's suppose to be Charity being shell shocked but they come across to me as typos.

You should dake your kids up to the bountains, Miss Harpica. Show them dhe reservoir. I’b sure they’d enjoy it.

I bow your foals probably would love a little trip to the lake, after being coobed up for so long,

The clipboard snapped her nose when her assistant exploded. Then an adult thief kicked her in the face and then in the head.  The blood likely flowed into her nose and disrupts her speech, because when Harpica leaves...

“Dho...” Charity muttered, watching her and then starting to stagger after her.  The filly coughed and snorted the sticky blood from her nostrils.  “No.”

Battle damage is nice to see.  It's all well and good for a character to get shot in the shoulder, but when bleeding visibly disrupts speech that's a pretty neat detail.

[RoboRed]

Spoiler:

[Icy Shake]

Spoiler:

Shaggy dog-iest story ever.

[Exodus Hero]

Spoiler:

Shaggy dog-iest story ever.

Shoot that dog :)

I can see it now...:

[O. Hinds]

And here’s Part Two!

[Somber]

Sorry that it's so bad...

also, made a tiny little tweak at the end...

[Guest]

Massive spoilers (to the best of my knowledge):

[atikin]

And here’s Part Two!

Where exactly can I get it? It's not available in your Google storage.

[O. Hinds]

And here’s Part Two!

Where exactly can I get it? It's not available in your Google storage.

That's odd; I've just testing the link through the hub page (while not logged in, just in case), and it worked fine.  What specific problem are you seeing?  The link just isn't there?
edit: Here's a direct link, for your convenience. I'd still like to get that problem tracked down, though.

[atikin]

The document with all the chapters listed is not up to date. There's no option to open part two at all. 
Thanks for the direct link though.

[O. Hinds]

...That is very peculiar. You're using the hub page linked in my signature, right? This?

[atikin]

Yeah, I used this page. But now there is a link to part two in there. I don't know what the problem was, but it's OK now. Thanks.

[WavemasterRyx]

*nuzzles Somber and Hinds each just barely*

Chapter 75b Commentary:

Really not a great commentary, I apologize... I still hope the move, and EFNW, and the patreon go well... I hope it's still around by the time I'm ever able to contribute.

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