[Official!] Project Horizons Comment Crew Chat thread.
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Re: [Official!] Project Horizons Comment Crew Chat thread.
They never show up if we ever have to pull a calf out of a cow. I imagine that makes for a great sight.
Just have our entire upper body and arms covered in afterbirth and them going "Have you heard of the good news of Jesus Christ?"
I'd be like "Sure. He just helped us deliver this calf, saving it's mother at the same time. Come join us in this blessing of life with a hug."
And it's subconscious Harmony. Read that VG Cats comic too many times, plus I had a friend who use to cosplay as Aerith who I use to joke around with every time I went off for my family reunion.
Just have our entire upper body and arms covered in afterbirth and them going "Have you heard of the good news of Jesus Christ?"
I'd be like "Sure. He just helped us deliver this calf, saving it's mother at the same time. Come join us in this blessing of life with a hug."
And it's subconscious Harmony. Read that VG Cats comic too many times, plus I had a friend who use to cosplay as Aerith who I use to joke around with every time I went off for my family reunion.
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Re: [Official!] Project Horizons Comment Crew Chat thread.
That phrasing makes me think of you with a crowbar stuck up the mother's special place, trying to pry out the spawn that's clinging desperately to the placenta.Moodyman90 wrote:pull a calf out of a cow.
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Re: [Official!] Project Horizons Comment Crew Chat thread.
It's not quite that bad. In reality the way we do it is
We don't usually have to do it often. Once every 5 or so years if we're unlucky. And naturally when we do have to something has gone very very wrong. Like the calf was stillborn and the cow simply gave up.
- Hidden cause of potential graphic mental images.:
- We quite literally shove our arms inside of her through that area and try to find the front end of the calf. Usually it's facing the back end already but sometimes the calf is backwards. Once we figure out which was it's coming out we try to get some chains around it's hooves. We actually have these specialty made stainless steel chains just for when we have to do this. Once we get the chains around the hooves we pull and pull and pull. Maybe have to reach in again to grab the calf and pull on the chains and the calf itself if we're really having trouble.
We don't usually have to do it often. Once every 5 or so years if we're unlucky. And naturally when we do have to something has gone very very wrong. Like the calf was stillborn and the cow simply gave up.
Moodyman90- Draconequus
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Re: [Official!] Project Horizons Comment Crew Chat thread.
Oh, I was quite aware of having to get a little "hands on". I wasn't aware you got the luxury of chains.Moodyman90 wrote:It's not quite that bad. In reality the way we do it is
- Hidden cause of potential graphic mental images.:
We quite literally shove our arms inside of her through that area and try to find the front end of the calf. Usually it's facing the back end already but sometimes the calf is backwards. Once we figure out which was it's coming out we try to get some chains around it's hooves. We actually have these specialty made stainless steel chains just for when we have to do this. Once we get the chains around the hooves we pull and pull and pull. Maybe have to reach in again to grab the calf and pull on the chains and the calf itself if we're really having trouble.
We don't usually have to do it often. Once every 5 or so years if we're unlucky. And naturally when we do have to something has gone very very wrong. Like the calf was stillborn and the cow simply gave up.
Can't both the calf and the mother die if the calf is spewed forth backwards?
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Re: [Official!] Project Horizons Comment Crew Chat thread.
The calf has a chance of dying due to the process of birth forcing it to actually try to breath through it's nose and mouth. Even if it doesn't drown there's not a lot of air in there. Basically becomes a race against time if that's the case.
I'm certain it's very bad for the mother for a lot of different reasons but the only danger I can think of is if the calf dies and we don't get it out before it starts decomposing inside of her.
And yeah we have the chains. Not everybody has those chains.
I'm certain it's very bad for the mother for a lot of different reasons but the only danger I can think of is if the calf dies and we don't get it out before it starts decomposing inside of her.
And yeah we have the chains. Not everybody has those chains.
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Re: [Official!] Project Horizons Comment Crew Chat thread.
Yeah, I'd imagine having a decomposing body inside oneself would be unhealthy. That's why cows should have another tube in the womb leading into the digestive tract, so they can reabsorb all those nutrients from a stillbirth.
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Re: [Official!] Project Horizons Comment Crew Chat thread.
I woke up and took my dog for a walk, only to find several grocery bags loaded with vegetables, all hanging on the door knob. That was both one of the coolest and most aggravating events of my week.
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Re: [Official!] Project Horizons Comment Crew Chat thread.
Aggravating in which way ?
Harmony Ltd.- Draconequus
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Re: [Official!] Project Horizons Comment Crew Chat thread.
I was half-asleep because I had just awoken, and I had my little yorkie-poo Bear Bear on his leash to take him for a walk. I have the leashed, energetic furball on one arm, and the month's worth of groceries on the door to deal with. Couldn't just leave the stuff there because it was propping the storm door open, and Ohio is notorious for its bees, wasps, and hornets. Bear was choking himself in an attempt to chase a cat, and our porch is on rollers. Trying to fight with all of that at the time while coffee-less and half asleep was pretty frustrating.
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Re: [Official!] Project Horizons Comment Crew Chat thread.
How did that bag of groceries get there anyway ?
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Re: [Official!] Project Horizons Comment Crew Chat thread.
The pastor of my dad's church brought it down while I was asleep.
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Re: [Official!] Project Horizons Comment Crew Chat thread.
The Church does deliveries now ?
"Redemption in 30 minutes guaranteed or your money back !"
"Redemption in 30 minutes guaranteed or your money back !"
Last edited by Harmony Ltd. on Sat Aug 17, 2013 5:45 pm; edited 1 time in total
Harmony Ltd.- Draconequus
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Re: [Official!] Project Horizons Comment Crew Chat thread.
Lots of pants-on-head retardedness going on in the social networks.
Wait, let me rephrase that: More than the usual amount of pants-on-head retardedness going on in the social networks.
Wait, let me rephrase that: More than the usual amount of pants-on-head retardedness going on in the social networks.
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Re: [Official!] Project Horizons Comment Crew Chat thread.
Not the worst thing a pastor's done while a boy's sleeping, I suppose.
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Re: [Official!] Project Horizons Comment Crew Chat thread.
>Is reminded that I really need to get that Maverick 88 I've had my eye on.Mister Frost wrote:Not the worst thing a pastor's done while a boy's sleeping, I suppose.
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Re: [Official!] Project Horizons Comment Crew Chat thread.
Ironmonger wrote:Maverick 88
?
Harmony Ltd.- Draconequus
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Re: [Official!] Project Horizons Comment Crew Chat thread.
GET OFF MY LAWN! ლ(ಠ益ಠლ)Harmony Ltd. wrote:*snip*Ironmonger wrote:Maverick 88
>Boom
Seriously, though. It's a cheaper and simplified version of the Mossberg 500. I can get one for $200 at my local Walmart
- Spoiler:
Last edited by Ironmonger on Sat Aug 17, 2013 5:51 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Re: [Official!] Project Horizons Comment Crew Chat thread.
What's the trouble ?Valikdu wrote:Lots of pants-on-head retardedness going on in the social networks.
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Re: [Official!] Project Horizons Comment Crew Chat thread.
That too, but he referred to the Mossberg MaverickHarmony Ltd. wrote:*snip*Ironmonger wrote:Maverick 88
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Re: [Official!] Project Horizons Comment Crew Chat thread.
Cows have neither large enough stomachs to deal with something that big or the right digestive enzymes to consume flesh. If cows were grass-eating robots, (and therefore leagues simpler,) your idea would be a case of overengineering. Even if the requirements to make such a system work weren't extreme, it would be rarely used and have its own chance of catastrophic failure.Mister Frost wrote:Yeah, I'd imagine having a decomposing body inside oneself would be unhealthy. That's why cows should have another tube in the womb leading into the digestive tract, so they can reabsorb all those nutrients from a stillbirth.
As a joke meant to be disgusting, I give it an 8/10. As a joke meant to be funny, it only ranks at 6/10 at best. (As a videogame, it gets 7.5/10)
Derpmind- Mindmaster Extraordinaire
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Re: [Official!] Project Horizons Comment Crew Chat thread.
A lot of people are, with great resolve, cosplaying Jack Thompson.Harmony Ltd. wrote:What's the trouble ?Valikdu wrote:Lots of pants-on-head retardedness going on in the social networks.
Currently they're trying to get Ask Princess Molestia banned, because "it makes people into rapists".
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Re: [Official!] Project Horizons Comment Crew Chat thread.
Really I thought they were saying something about his blog making fun of such things. Never had anything pop up in my tumblr other the those people supporting jj so I have no clue.
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Re: [Official!] Project Horizons Comment Crew Chat thread.
Odd. I thought raping someone makes you into a rapistValikdu wrote:A lot of people are, with great resolve, cosplaying Jack Thompson.Harmony Ltd. wrote:What's the trouble ?Valikdu wrote:Lots of pants-on-head retardedness going on in the social networks.
Currently they're trying to get Ask Princess Molestia banned, because "it makes people into rapists".
Sounds like the Dickwolves incident all over
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Re: [Official!] Project Horizons Comment Crew Chat thread.
My thoughts exactly.Mister Frost wrote:Odd. I thought raping someone makes you into a rapistValikdu wrote:A lot of people are, with great resolve, cosplaying Jack Thompson.Harmony Ltd. wrote:What's the trouble ?Valikdu wrote:Lots of pants-on-head retardedness going on in the social networks.
Currently they're trying to get Ask Princess Molestia banned, because "it makes people into rapists".
Sounds like the Dickwolves incident all over
Rapes jokes are... Well, they should be avoided, I think.
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Re: [Official!] Project Horizons Comment Crew Chat thread.
If you're offended by such jokes. Yes you should avoid them.
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Re: [Official!] Project Horizons Comment Crew Chat thread.
I hope you never meet me in person, then. Just ask Iron; threatening to rape him is pretty much how I say 'Hi'Harmony Ltd. wrote:My thoughts exactly.
Rapes jokes are... Well, they should be avoided, I think.
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Re: [Official!] Project Horizons Comment Crew Chat thread.
It's not really a question of if they offend me or not. It's more that such jokes (rape jokes, sexist jokes, etc...), even if they are made in good fun and without ill intentions, participate to a culture that validate those things.
See, rapist men (I don't know about rapist women) think that all men are inherently rapists, and that they (the other men) only posture as "good people" for the sake of social standing. When you do rape jokes, you validate them in their thoughts, support their worldview, and indirectly encourage them to be rapists.
I know it's really not a fun thing to think about, and I know saying such a thing makes me sound as a "no-fun-allowed" kind of guy, but really, I think rape jokes should be avoided.
With a bit of imagination, it's easy to find other things to joke about.
See, rapist men (I don't know about rapist women) think that all men are inherently rapists, and that they (the other men) only posture as "good people" for the sake of social standing. When you do rape jokes, you validate them in their thoughts, support their worldview, and indirectly encourage them to be rapists.
I know it's really not a fun thing to think about, and I know saying such a thing makes me sound as a "no-fun-allowed" kind of guy, but really, I think rape jokes should be avoided.
With a bit of imagination, it's easy to find other things to joke about.
Harmony Ltd.- Draconequus
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Re: [Official!] Project Horizons Comment Crew Chat thread.
On a more general note, it's harder to create new jokes than it is to recycle old jokes and memes endlessly. Making new jokes is a creative endeavor that will yield results, while spouting off old ones is the same thing 99% of everyone else does all the time. You don't want to be another everyone else, do you?Harmony Ltd. wrote:With a bit of imagination, it's easy to find other things to joke about.
Think of the first racist or sexist (etc.) joke that pops in your head. Exactly how old is it, and why do you personally still find it funny?
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Re: [Official!] Project Horizons Comment Crew Chat thread.
Every time I hear someone say "Rape and molestation jokes are never funny", I'm reminded of the words of George Carlin:
Picture Porky Pig.....Raping Elmer Fudd. Well, why did you think they call him 'porky'?
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Re: [Official!] Project Horizons Comment Crew Chat thread.
Source
And the flame wars continue.
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