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[GRIMDARK] Fallout Equestria: Project Horizons Discussion

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Post by SilentCarto Sat Jul 13, 2013 1:38 am

Nightshade wrote:I, um, want to know if I'm guessing this right about the story so far... it's nothing big, but it might be along the lines of spoilers. Sorry.
Shy 
Boo sorry if I startled you:

I hope I'm not sounding dumb for asking.
Shy
She's always shown a level of perception that borders on precognition. I don't think she's getting more perceptive. More comprehending of what she perceives, maybe, but she still picked up on how firearms work within seconds of seeing one in operation.

If ch. 56 cemented anything, I think it's that she's starting to pick up morals and social norms.

cb5 wrote:
Nightshade wrote:Sad how her fingers no longer work
Probably user error.  No really.  Remember how when she first got her cybernetics she didn't know how to use them?  My guess is that these new fingers work in a different way and she doesn't know how to use them.  It'd be like if you took like someone that has only ever used a mac and popped them in front of a pc.

[GRIMDARK] Fallout Equestria: Project Horizons Discussion - Page 20 Mac_vs_pc_by_tess_27-d40slgc

I suspect you're right. Possibly also the Goddess screwing with her, though I can't imagine why she would fear BJ's fingers. I doubt they were installed wrong, given that Rover was the one telling her how useful hands were in the first place.

O. Hinds wrote:[GRIMDARK] Fallout Equestria: Project Horizons Discussion - Page 20 Somber11
57!
EEEEEEEEE!
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Post by FeatherDust Sat Jul 13, 2013 1:46 am

swicked wrote:No one controls the lobotomites. Their trauma harnesses just cause them to act with aggression toward everyone.
Trauma harnesses are a different monster from Lobotomites.
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Post by Derpmind Sat Jul 13, 2013 1:54 am

So I finally remembered to do a read-through or whatever it's called. I'm really sleepy right now, so I'm just gonna paste it without editing and hope I get all the linebreaks in right. Awesome chapter Somber!

Spoiler:
Heh, I put Sgt Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band on earlier while reading, and right now it's on "A Day in the Life," my favorite Beatles song and the end of the album. And this is apparently the first post of whatever I called it because I can't remember right now.
Fluttershy
Night everyone!


Last edited by Derpmind on Sat Jul 13, 2013 2:03 am; edited 2 times in total
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Post by Moodyman90 Sat Jul 13, 2013 1:55 am

Before I head off for the night, I'm going to say I rather enjoyed chapter 57. Also that I was with Blackjack the whole time on "something bad is going to happen."

I know I've recently expressed a certain viewpoint of how I feel things to come should turn out, but at this point in time, Somber you write the next chapter and the rest of Project Horizons how you feel it should be written.

There's probably some part in the chapter some people won't like or agree with. Especially some bits towards the end. Granted it's not worth anything but in my opinion those parts where handled with respect and maturity.

Somber, thank you again for writing this story and for another chapter in it, and thanks to the brushing team.



Also while editing isn't really my thing there was at least one instance of "our" being typed as "or" and "be" when it should have been "he". Sorry I can't be more helpful of where those are but I'm certain somebody with a keener eye, better memory, and time to do a full review can help direct to those minor mistakes.
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Post by Icy Shake Sat Jul 13, 2013 3:29 am

Wow. Another one out quickly. Might as well dive right in . . .

Running thoughts:

Overall:

Editing:

Anyway, thank you, Somber, Hinds, and Niphl/Bronode for the great chapter. It was a marvelous end to something of a frustrating week.
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Post by Icy Shake Sat Jul 13, 2013 3:36 am

Somber wrote:/me waits nervously from people to find out how bad it was...

Icy Shake, from my running thoughts wrote:
Somber wrote:Sucks.  Just... horrible.  Probably going to cut it short so it might only be 20-25 pages.
It's at [this] point that I can—already!—say that, even if this was true on July 5th, it's certainly bullshit now.

Seriously, this was a very fun chapter, even if it necessarily wasn't perfect, and there are events one could object to (which were nevertheless handled very well, regardless about how one would handle them based on prior feelings), as the natural consequence of taking risks. Anyway, as far as I'm concerned, you were just about as wrong about it being horrible as you were about it ending up in the low twenty page range.
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Post by SilentCarto Sat Jul 13, 2013 4:23 am

Well, this chapter was just awful.
No, wait, the other thing. Awesome!

Ch. 57 Commentary:

Editing:
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Post by Kippershy Sat Jul 13, 2013 4:33 am

I saw that, O.hinds
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Post by SilentCarto Sat Jul 13, 2013 4:34 am

Oh, and before anyone starts ranting about what Somber should or should not have written, I just want to say:
I believe in Somber!
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Post by Quotidian Sat Jul 13, 2013 4:45 am

Somber wrote:/me waits nervously from people to find out how bad it was...
You shut your self-deprecating face hole. This was the best chapter.

I'll have more to say later (need sleep now) but I absolutely loved the big reunion. When Stronghoof showed up I made a high pitched squeaking noise that lasted a good thirty seconds. And Bottlecap! I love that mare. And Rampage being adorable and Hoity being awesome and BJ eating the crown! Ahhhhhhhhhh! So many happy feels!

Oh, and a pegasus named Storm Front. What are the odds? >_>
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Post by WovenTales Sat Jul 13, 2013 4:46 am

I loved the chapter. It was nice seeing (or hearing about) oldish allies. Even if the rules of literature mean anyone offscreen is safer than they would otherwise be, the wasteland is harsh enough that it's nice to get conformation that both the gangers/Highlander and Xanthe's group are safe. Still think a spinoff following the second would be fun. Really need to get into the habit of writing those reaction commentaries, though; the only thing I remember is that my reaction to Stronghoof's summery of who they needed was roughly: "I'm not sure about the 'social order' part, but I might know of a few who could help, if you don't mind ghouls."
Spoiler:
Fixes:


Last edited by WovenTales on Sat Jul 13, 2013 4:57 am; edited 1 time in total (Reason for editing : Spoilering spoilers)
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Post by Kippershy Sat Jul 13, 2013 4:50 am

O.Hinds... any idea if the intention was to use "snirk" at all? I mean, it's an urban dictionary hybrid word, but I'm feeling Somber probably meant smirk.

Just to let you know.
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Post by O. Hinds Sat Jul 13, 2013 5:04 am

@Derpmind, Icy Shake, SilentCarto, and WovenTales:
Ah, thank you as usual for the error spotting.

Kippershy wrote:I saw that, O.hinds
Saw what?

Kippershy wrote:O.Hinds... any idea if the intention was to use "snirk" at all? I mean, it's an urban dictionary hybrid word, but I'm feeling Somber probably meant smirk.

Just to let you know.
This came up during editing, in fact, and it is intentionally snirk. Thank you, though; it might indeed have been an error that we'd missed.
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Post by Kippershy Sat Jul 13, 2013 5:45 am

boo:

and yes, a very enjoyable chapter. Like I said on steam, I've had no issues with what you thought I'd have issues with and actually, hadn't any issues with anything at all in this chapter.
Knowing your plan for the next chapter, can't say I have any issues with that either.
You did good, it was an enjoyable chapter, definitely.
No need to worry about it.
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Post by Evilgidgit Sat Jul 13, 2013 6:06 am

SilentCarto wrote:Oh, and before anyone starts ranting about what Somber should or should not have written, I just want to say:
I believe in Somber!
I also believe in Somber!
Dancing PinkiePie 
Yay, new chapter!
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Post by Evilgidgit Sat Jul 13, 2013 7:42 am

That was a really enjoyable chapter.

Spoiler:
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Post by Guest Sat Jul 13, 2013 9:49 am

Somber wrote:"She spoke in the odd accident from trottingham."

57 thoughts:


Last edited by Last on Sat Jul 13, 2013 10:53 am; edited 2 times in total

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Post by Guest Sat Jul 13, 2013 9:50 am

Sorry guys. Accidentally did a thing. I'll make it readable in a moment.

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Post by O. Hinds Sat Jul 13, 2013 10:04 am

@Last:
Wow, that's... quite a thing. Thank you for spotting the one error that I can read from that, at least. Oh, and please, when you're ready, either put the corrected version in a new post or make a new post announcing that the corrected version is up.
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Post by Guest Sat Jul 13, 2013 10:51 am

I fixed it. It had something to do with a font I copy/pasted.

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Post by Evilgidgit Sat Jul 13, 2013 11:30 am

Being me, I am intrigued who the "war hero" is that was mentioned when his wife broke into Shadowbolt Tower.
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Post by Icy Shake Sat Jul 13, 2013 11:40 am

SilentCarto wrote:Oh, and before anyone starts ranting about what Somber should or should not have written, I just want to say:
I believe in Somber!
I am Sombricus!

Quotidian wrote:
Somber wrote:/me waits nervously from people to find out how bad it was...
You shut your self-deprecating face hole. This was the best chapter.
Sorry, but did you really just miss the "This was the Best Chapter Ever!" softball? Spike

Last wrote:
57 thoughts:
Spoiler:
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Post by Ditzy_Do0 Sat Jul 13, 2013 11:46 am

Please let P-21 and Blackjack get together!!!! I've been hoping for this since they left the Stable! 
And let's get him a name shall we? :D:omg:

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Post by SilentCarto Sat Jul 13, 2013 12:51 pm

Derpmind wrote:Choo Choo! Security saves Ponies? No, Security protects everyone. Blackjack is grasping at the greater ideals that she can’t quite (I swear there’s a word for saying stuff coherently.)
Articulate?

Icy Shake wrote:You’re no more queen of the Society than you are a Reaper of the Top Ten.

Hey, she totally warrants Top Ten status, even if she doesn't go out of her way to claim it.
That's the point. Emphasis on "Reaper" -- she doesn't work specifically for the good of the Reapers, she doesn't participate in their society... she may have the title of "Top Ten", but she's not really a member of the gang.

Icy Shake wrote:I don't remember which fic it was in (Through the Eyes?), but there was a character named Storm Front or Stormfront that the author renamed after finding out about the neo-Nazi group.
Meh, who cares? It's a perfectly good meteorological term.

Last wrote:I'm still very disappointed with Glory renouncing monagomy. But then I just cannot understand why BJ's upbringing is so engrained into her while Glory's appears to be so easily given up.
BJ already said she would be monogamous for Glory's sake even if she thought it was crazy. And really, between the two of them, Glory is the one who's already been required to question a whole lot of her beliefs just by being in the Wasteland, and by Lighthooves' actions.

Last wrote:As for The Goddess I'm not sure how wise removing the pipbuck in the bathroom was. Surely that's immediately going to raise alarms with her friends. It's obvious the goddess understands the capabilities of the pipbuck, so of course she knows that her friends are going to find regardless of where she removed it. Still I don't see why she wouldn't try and stall them by placing it somewhere difficult to reach, or better yet outright destroy it.
Why would finding her PipBuck aim her friends toward the Goddess in any way? Aside from Lacunae also being missing, there's nothing (as far as the Goddess knows) that would point them toward Maripony.

Last wrote:The only explanation I can think of is she's so confident in her plans she doesn't believe BJ's friends finding the pipbuck will effect it. In which case I would have to say she's completely discounted the dealer.
To be fair, the Goddess barely understands the Dealer at all. The only time she's directly encountered him, she tried to kill him with physical attacks. But you're right, he's probably going to be the big damn hero here.

Evilgidgit wrote:Being me, I am intrigued who the "war hero" is that was mentioned when his wife broke into Shadowbolt Tower.
*Hit! Head! On! Desk!*
Sky Striker would qualify as a war hero, wouldn't he? That completely passed me by the first time.


Last edited by SilentCarto on Sat Jul 13, 2013 1:53 pm; edited 3 times in total
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Post by Icy Shake Sat Jul 13, 2013 1:05 pm

SilentCarto wrote:
Icy Shake wrote:You’re no more queen of the Society than you are a Reaper of the Top Ten.

Hey, she totally warrants Top Ten status, even if she doesn't go out of her way to claim it.
That's the point. Emphasis on "Reaper" -- she doesn't work specifically for the good of the Reapers, she doesn't participate in their society... she may have the title of "Top Ten", but she's not really a member of the gang.
My point wasn't that she really identified as a Reaper, but that they, in their small way, have a claim on her just as the Society does, even if she transcends both of them, and the other groups besides. And, crucially, that even if she isn't a Reaper by her principles and actions, she is by their principles, until they change them. [Addendum:] And, in her own mind, being a Reaper was always more than just membership in some group, but about being an unstoppable monster of the Wasteland, and though she is a very good one, she certainly fits the bill.

SilentCarto wrote:
Icy Shake wrote:I don't remember which fic it was in (Through the Eyes?), but there was a character named Storm Front or Stormfront that the author renamed after finding out about the neo-Nazi group.
Meh, who cares? It's a perfectly good meteorological term.
I certainly don't. I was just remembering something that happened and the silliness around it.

SilentCarto wrote:
Last wrote:I'm still very disappointed with Glory renouncing monagomy. But then I just cannot understand why BJ's upbringing is so engrained into her while Glory's appears to be so easily given up.
BJ already said she would be monogamous for Glory's sake even if she thought it was crazy. And really, between the two of them, Glory is the one who's already been required to question a whole lot of her beliefs just by being in the Wasteland, and by Lighthooves' actions.
Also this.

Oh, and on Last's "observation," I think that Blackjack may be in heat.
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Post by Harmony Ltd. Sat Jul 13, 2013 1:09 pm

Icy Shake wrote:I think that Blackjack may be in heat.
Considering the bit with Lancer in 56 and later how she was looking to "use" her guards to "relieve tension", for me it's more of a certainty than a supposition.
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Post by Moodyman90 Sat Jul 13, 2013 1:16 pm

I pretty much went with "all the mares are in heat" after that discussion they had a few chapters back. I admit the bit with Lancer last chapter caught me off guard at first but it make sense if Blackjack is also in heat.

The other option is that she's just horny all the time now since between her continuing cyber-facation and the Goddess taking her over she wants to enjoy that little part that makes her feel like herself from before all that's happened to her.

I'm leaning more to she's in heat.
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Post by Somber Sat Jul 13, 2013 1:20 pm

I'm glad the chapter went okay.  I know 4chan won't like it, but they don't like anything.  Seriously.  I have never seen them praise any story.  So I've learned not to be sorry about not gaining something that I'm not going to get.

I do have one regret about the chapter though.  No song.  I have one in my head for it.  I have the music in my head for it, but I have no way to create it.  I imagined P-21 telling Blackjack to finally relax as they twirl around the dance floor.  Then Glory jumps in.  Then P-21.  Then both of them together.  Then fade to the 'ahem' scene.  Since it's a slow song, I can't find real world analogies to use.
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Post by SilentCarto Sat Jul 13, 2013 2:01 pm

Hey, did you guys hear about the outcast zebras who worship "A Song of Ice and Fire"?

They call them... the Stark-katteri.
(badumTISH)
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Post by Somber Sat Jul 13, 2013 2:04 pm

...wat?
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