A Cold Night's Dream
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A Cold Night's Dream
Might as well put this here so more people can read it, so here's my latest story.
Please let me know what you think, point out any edits I need to make, etc.
(sorry for low quality post, I'm tired )
Prologue: Waking Up
Chapter 1: Lullaby
Chapter 2: New Acquaintances
Chapter 3: Searches
Chapter 4: Golden Apple
Chapter 5: Messes
Chapter 6: Ramification
Chapter 7: Shadows of the Past
Chapter 8: Rise
Chapter 9: Buried Emotion
Chapter 10: Blood and Chitin
Please let me know what you think, point out any edits I need to make, etc.
(sorry for low quality post, I'm tired )
Prologue: Waking Up
Chapter 1: Lullaby
Chapter 2: New Acquaintances
Chapter 3: Searches
Chapter 4: Golden Apple
Chapter 5: Messes
Chapter 6: Ramification
Chapter 7: Shadows of the Past
Chapter 8: Rise
Chapter 9: Buried Emotion
Chapter 10: Blood and Chitin
Last edited by CamoBadger on Sun Jan 13, 2013 3:18 pm; edited 7 times in total
CamoBadger- Royal Alicorn
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Re: A Cold Night's Dream
All the chapters are great. Keep up the awesome work Drevin.
XT Vengeance- High Inquisitor of Jackassery
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Re: A Cold Night's Dream
Original post updated with Chapter 3. Please enjoy!
CamoBadger- Royal Alicorn
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Re: A Cold Night's Dream
Very well written chapter Drevin. I didn't even find any grammar/spelling mistakes this time. :P
XT Vengeance- High Inquisitor of Jackassery
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Re: A Cold Night's Dream
Huzzah! I've improved!XT Vengeance wrote:Very well written chapter Drevin. I didn't even find any grammar/spelling mistakes this time. :P
CamoBadger- Royal Alicorn
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Re: A Cold Night's Dream
Until the next chapter, when you get 50 spelling mistakes. :PIce Crystal wrote:Huzzah! I've improved!XT Vengeance wrote:Very well written chapter Drevin. I didn't even find any grammar/spelling mistakes this time. :P
XT Vengeance- High Inquisitor of Jackassery
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Re: A Cold Night's Dream
Awesome.Ice Crystal wrote:Original post updated with Chapter 3. Please enjoy!
Didn't notice any little mistakes.
Orm- Alicorn
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Re: A Cold Night's Dream
Chapter 4 up, enjoy!
CamoBadger- Royal Alicorn
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Re: A Cold Night's Dream
And Chaper 5 up!
Chapter 6 will likely follow quickly due to having split one chapter I was writing into 2 parts (I was getting a good ways into it and realized it's a bit too long for my style, so I split it.)
Chapter 6 will likely follow quickly due to having split one chapter I was writing into 2 parts (I was getting a good ways into it and realized it's a bit too long for my style, so I split it.)
CamoBadger- Royal Alicorn
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Re: A Cold Night's Dream
And Chapter 6 is done, added onto original post. Please enjoy!
CamoBadger- Royal Alicorn
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Re: A Cold Night's Dream
Found an error halfway through page 7. celestia folded open a book, I'd suggest changing it to unfolded or opened.
Other than that, no mistakes, and it was good. Very creepy story too. Keep it up mein Herr.
Other than that, no mistakes, and it was good. Very creepy story too. Keep it up mein Herr.
XT Vengeance- High Inquisitor of Jackassery
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Re: A Cold Night's Dream
Over 1 month later, I've finally got new chapters!
Chapters 7 & 8 have been added to the original post. I was going to have them as one chapter, but I felt that chapter 8 held more impact if it was by itself rather than tied in with Ch.7.
I hope you all still enjoy this story, and please help me out with edits if you fine them, THANKS!
Chapters 7 & 8 have been added to the original post. I was going to have them as one chapter, but I felt that chapter 8 held more impact if it was by itself rather than tied in with Ch.7.
I hope you all still enjoy this story, and please help me out with edits if you fine them, THANKS!
CamoBadger- Royal Alicorn
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Re: A Cold Night's Dream
Once again, new chapter is up very VERY late. I'm sorry if this takes so long, but I was having issues being motivated to write it. Luckily, my ass was kicked enough times to get me working on it again. I hope anyone that reads it enjoys it.
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Re: A Cold Night's Dream
And after yet ANOTHER month long wait, ch10 is out and ready to read.
Please don't cringe at my horrible attempts at humor in it.
Please don't cringe at my horrible attempts at humor in it.
CamoBadger- Royal Alicorn
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Re: A Cold Night's Dream
GASP!
Must read!
Must read!
Orm- Alicorn
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Re: A Cold Night's Dream
Finished reading the chapter.
I liked it, and I thought the humour was pretty good too.
I liked it, and I thought the humour was pretty good too.
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Re: A Cold Night's Dream
Glad you liked it
CamoBadger- Royal Alicorn
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Re: A Cold Night's Dream
Anyone remember this story? No? Didn't think so. Because it's not one I write very much, to the disdain of some. However, I'm writing the new chapter right now, and because I enjoy brewing tension, I felt like putting up a teaser. So, for anyone who gives two shits, here it is:
- Chapter 11 Teaser:
The shroud of trees and curling vines disappeared into the abyss of swirling black and violet magic which was the realm of dreams; Luna’s home away from home. It had certainly been an interesting dream in the brief time she spent searching the gardener’s thoughts, but she couldn’t spare any time to dwell on what may have been going on there or enjoy the curious goings on of pony’s minds. Even if it did break her duties and fill the princess with more guilt than normally, she had a more pressing matter to attend to. The fears and life troubles of her people, those who looked up to her to defend them not only in the corporeal world, unfortunately had to be pushed back to a later time.
She wasn’t sure if she was glad not to find the monster she sought, or if she wished he would show himself and be done with it. Of course, there was always the thought that she would never find him and that her plan was only false hope doomed to failure, but it was the only plan anyone had. If he could invade and twist the dreams of others, as she could, it only stood to reason that the princess should be able to find him and confront him. But those prospects filled her mind with doubt and, unfortunately, fear; the one thing she would rather not feel when faced with the being she hunted.
If Praeses were telling the truth about Deimos, then she already felt a small disadvantage against a creature that was supposedly on the same level of existence as Discord; who was only defeated by the combined powers of the Elements of Harmony. Even when she and her sister had felled the Spirit of Chaos, they did so together. If another of his kind were anywhere near as powerful, then could she defeat him at all?
“Of course I can,” Luna scolded herself proudly. “If the olden ponies could capture him, then surely I can contain him alone.” She hoped at least, but just assuring herself, no matter how much doubt she still felt, at least restored her confidence and desire to face him.
Another storm of red energy among the realm of dreams floated before the princess; a sure sign of a nightmare, and hopefully, the place she may find this Spirit of Fear. Without hesitation, Luna folded her wings and dove into the cloud. She burst through into a field of waving corn that seemed to stretch on eternally. With a groan of irritation, she thrust herself into the air to hover over the dreamscape, searching for any sign of the spirit; whatever he may look like or choose to appear as. Suddenly, her search seemed even more hopeless, with the realization that if Deimos could twist dreams like her, he may very well be able to disguise himself as anything he wished.
Unfortunately, this seemed to be a usual nightmare; nothing excessive or strange about it, just a field of corn that doubtlessly contained a scared and running pony. Doubtlessly a dream she would have exercised her influence over if it were any other night, but instead she could only make a mental note to find it again after completing her mission. Another dead end it seemed and another waste of precious minutes in her night.
Lighting her horn to leave, Luna halted her exit at a strange sight in the distance. A single falling star that somehow broke through the endless cover of clouds in the cornfield nightmare, pulling the princess’ attention for only a moment before she decided it was nothing. At least, until the spell which usually granted instant exit from any dream didn’t seem to work. Magic pulsed around her and began to dissolve the dream from around her, but before the realm of dreams could fully retake her, the dream snapped back in around her with a backlash that whipped through her mind like a storm.
CamoBadger- Royal Alicorn
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Re: A Cold Night's Dream
I read Cold as Ice not too long ago (actually after Snowdrops came out. I remember thinking "this is kinda like Snowdrops, but not shit.") But I've not read this yet. I'll be sure to give it a read when I get the chance.
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